Yes, I know. disgusting isn’t it - but this bird has not been plucked alive!

Nor has it suffered the cockerel equivalent of alopecia (which I guess would be alopeckya - ouch!)

But it has been deliberately genetically engineered to be born this way!

Why? Because ’silly old’ Mother Nature has seen fit to persist with providing these poor birds with loads of hot old feathers that might make them feel uncomfortable in sunny climes!

So those ‘philanthropic’ scientist types just had to save the wretched creature from the vagaries of senile old Ma Nature!

And - Oh - what a surprise…do you know…this revision and improvement on what ‘must be’ an aberration of evolution also happens potentially to save $$$ when it comes to preparing chicken for the supermarket…because there’s no need to have to pluck the darned thing! That’s a bit of luck…I bet they never thought of that when they started fiddling with the fowls genetics (hah!)

They are, of course already hard at work on creating chickens that have their DNA genetically ’spliced’ with molecules of wheat flour, baker’s yeast, parsley and thyme so that by the time they are slaughtered they have naturally formed a herby-breadcrumb outer skin! (I suspect!)

I’m a little surprised that there has been no worries about the fact that such pitiful featherless follies will obviously be feeling the cold in winter…and who knows they may all end up with the ‘bird flu’! Then where would we be? (No doubt those same scientists have probably also been working on that other shameful scam - the Bird Flu vaccine!)

Also - little thought seems to have been wasted on whether or not such genetic freaks are actually going to be safe to eat…but then we aren’t supposed to worry our silly heads about that! Mind you I wouldn’t want to get my mouth round any cock or hen that had been fathered by something that had less than naturally occurring genes!

So I say to those meddling Frankensteins of the great bio-genetic labs - stop messing about with Mother Nature and put the (natural) genes back into your cock!